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Advice to writers: Comma Coma

Arts

Posted: June 22, 2014 7:00 a.m.
Updated: June 22, 2014 7:00 a.m.
 

I hate too many commas

They put me in a daze

Pages filled with commas

Cause my eyes to glaze.

Those little squiggly irritants

Sometimes seem contagious

They multiply within a text

In numbers just outrageous.

Like pepper from a shaker

They spill upon a page

I’m sure I’m not the only one

That they have caused to rage.

Periods are used quite well

So too the semicolon

But the usage of the comma

Makes me ill when it gets swollen.

Writers should be quarantined

Until they become aware

That this curly punctuation mark

Should be used with greater care.

We know the comma shows a pause

That’s very elementary

But sentences that pause, pause, pause

Put my reading tank on empty.

So writers, if the comma

Is your favorite thing to spread

Keep pouring out those commas,

But don’t expect that you’ll be read.

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