For one column, I turn Dem-o-crat. I know it is difficult to accept, but I'm going to sit with Gary Horton at the Koffee Klatch and kibitz about another failed Republican.
"It's just not fair." As the parent of any teenager knows, these words are often used by a child whenever a perceived injustice has occurred in their lives.
We here at the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy Office get numerous letters on a weekly basis. Some letters are profound and others profane, but almost all never fail to entertain.
I bought a gun. It's just a little .22 caliber rifle to teach the kids how to shoot. When it came, there was a National Rifle Association sign-up form in the box. I chuckled at the thought of me being a card-carrying NRA member. Our new squirrel gun sits next to Grandpa's old 12-gauge, double-barreled, side-by-side shotgun that I inherited several years ago. The shotgun is from the 1890s and has the words "King Nitro" ...
Once the recall of the Governator is complete, we're going to need a new governor. I know there are a lot of political hacks out there who think they can do the job. But, if an actor can run the ninth largest economy in the world, why not me?
How could you embarrass us this way, George? The latest revelations about your first 100 days in office are truly shocking. They cover the wire services and fill the evening news. Couldn't your press secretary have managed this better? Where were your perception doctors and spin-control? Was Karl Rove on vacation? How many gaffes did you make? Of course, we in the media will be more than happy to report on them now. It sells ...
By now, the entire baseball world is aware that Dodgers left fielder Manny Ramirez tested positive for a performance-enhancing drug hCG. Human chorionic gonadotropin, hCG, is a female reproductive chemical that stimulates the production of testosterone in males.
I don't watch beauty pageants. My lack of interest does not stem from some misguided belief that pageants somehow degrade women (we're putting them on a pedestal, for heaven's sake!). Its just that they bore me.
In ancient Roman mythology, a beautiful youth named Narcissus spurned the love of a nymph named Echo, who consoled herself by pining away in barren glens until only her voice remained. Sounds rather like a Republican in Sacramento.
From the smoldering wreckage that was the Republican Party, a Phoenix is rising with wide-spread wings and a mighty resolve.
The phone call came about 8 p.m. last Monday. I know because we were all sitting down to watch Chuck, the story of a nerd-turned-spy. Chuck is one of those rare TV shows that combines humor, action and character development without sacrificing too many family values.
When I was a kid, I loved watching magic shows. Guys like David Copperfield, Doug Henning, Andre Kole and Lance Burton would hold my attention for hours.
I am locked in a true conundrum. A conundrum is defined by Webster's as "an intricate and difficult problem."
My Uncle Earl has got to be one of the crustiest fellows I've ever seen. From his thinning mouse-gray hair to his weathered western cowboy boots, Earl's features speak to a life of difficult lessons and hard-earned wisdom. Earl's time in the Marine Corps taught him to be tough under fire and not mince words. He also knows the price that men have paid to make us all free.
A remarkable thing happened at Christ Lutheran Church on Tournament Road a couple weeks ago. Troop 609 held a National Eagle Court-of-Honor. What made it so remarkable was that not just one Eagle was christened but four.