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Michael Picarella: Kid bits from the ‘burbs

Picarella Family Report

Posted: January 29, 2010 9:48 p.m.
Updated: January 30, 2010 4:55 a.m.
Party time
Some people are Republicans. Some people are Democrats. Some people decline to state. My 6-year-old son said he’s a party man. “Hooray!” he says. “Party time!”

Hits the spot every time

“Living Spaces ... Yessss! Best Buy ... Yessss! Walmart — Save more, live better ... YES, YES, YESSSS!” My son loves when TV shows are interrupted so he can guess the commercials.

Santa’s “rain” deer
My boy told me that the rain comes from Santa Claus. Santa’s “rain” deer, evidently, fly into the air and, using magic, make rain so that we’ll all keep busy while everyone at the North Pole makes presents for next Christmas. My son said he didn’t learn that from anyone — he taught himself, he said.

My wife and I are feeling a bit tormented by our son who’s constantly telling us he loves us. Don’t get me wrong, we love the love. But he says he loves us every minute. My wife finally asked him, “When are you running for office?” He said, “Next year.” As it turns out, he wants to be boss of the house in 2011.

My son played soccer this season. Toward the end of one of the games where his team was losing 10-0, my boy confronted the other team’s coach and said, “Your team is doomed.”

Tent-ative conclusion
My 6-year-old and I put up the tent his grandparents got him many years ago. He was so excited he called to tell them. “Hi Grandpa and Grandma ... Today you gave me a tent last year when I was 2. Remember? We put it up.” That’s an actual quote.

Bike ride

My son just learned how to ride his bike without training wheels. Grandpa and Grandma, who live in Northern California, were on the phone with him, congratulating him. Grandpa asked him, “Can you ride your bike up here?” My son said, “Up where? I can’t see where you’re pointing.”

Half-birthdays to go
Last year in kindergarten, my son’s class celebrated his half-birthday, I guess because the teacher wanted every kid to get a birthday celebration in class and my son’s birthday is in July when school’s out. Now my son expects his half-birthday every year, and he expects presents and cake, too. “Half-birthdays are for when you’re little,” I told him. “You’re a big boy now, you don’t get half-birthdays anymore.” The kid looked bummed. Then he said, “You don’t want me to grow up too fast, do you?”

No peeking
I’m a big fan of the old Charlie Chaplin movies, and my 6-year-old grew up loving them, too. The other day, I thought I’d surprise him and put on one of our favorites, “Modern Times.” “Don’t look,” I said, “or no surprise.” He was so excited, anticipating what the surprise would be.
During the opening titles of the movie, my kid said with disappointment on his face, “A Chaplin film? Ah, Dad, I think I did peek. No surprise for me, right?” I told him I’d let it slide this time. “But Daddy, I don’t like grey movies anymore. I like detail.”

In an attempt to make our son confident, my wife and I created a monster — he’s a bit cocky at times. So we’re trying to teach him to be more humble. The other day, the kid complimented me on my game-playing skills.
“Don’t worry, Daddy,” he said afterward, “I’m not trying to be cocky at you.” He was afraid he’d make me cocky.

Michael Picarella is a Valencia resident and a proud husband and father. His column reflects his own opinion, not necessarily that of The Signal. To contact Picarella or to read more stories, go to


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