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Michael Picarella: Family news in brief

Picarella Family Report

Posted: December 25, 2009 10:16 p.m.
Updated: December 26, 2009 4:55 a.m.
Most wonderful time of year?
Recent visits to area stores and the mall for Christmas shopping this month ended all chances of this holiday season being dubbed “the most wonderful time of the year.”

Eyewitnesses reported numerous accounts where unruly shoppers made the simple tasks of driving, parking, walking through stores and waiting in orderly lines to purchase items a most miserable time — not a time of joy, not a time of peace on Earth, and certainly not a time of good will toward man.

“One woman actually ran me into a display of ‘Twilight: New Moon’ calendars at the calendar kiosk so she could grab a ‘Toy Story’ Etch-A-Sketch at the Disney Store before anyone else could,” my wife said after returning home from shopping last Saturday night. “Then some guy took my chai tea latte at Starbucks and said I could have his drink, which was due up shortly.”

I took my wife’s word about the misery out there in stores and let her finish the shopping. She let me go “giftless” this year.

Sleep found in boy’s eyes

My 6-year-old son woke up yesterday morning with sleep in his eyes. According to the kid, the liquid leaking from his eyes is associated with overflowing dreams.

“If my eyes get crusty,” my son said, “then that means I had bad dreams. And if I had bad dreams, then that means I didn’t get good sleep and that I’ll have bad behavior.”

Asked if he remembered his dreams from the night before, the boy said he couldn’t recall any or whether they were good or bad. Asked if he got good sleep, he said he wasn’t sure.

“It’s very possible he could misbehave at any moment,” my wife said. “And it all hinges on whether or not he had good dreams or bad dreams, which he determines by the sleep — or dreams — in his eyes and whether it seeps from his eyes or crusts over ... We had quite a predicament. So we wet a wash cloth and wiped the ‘dreams’ off his face.” The boy’s behavior was fine.

Movie theater patron keeps kicking seat
At about 1:30 p.m. on Sat., Dec. 12, while watching a movie at the Edwards Valencia 12, a young movie theater patron, who said he was in his 4s, was stopped from kicking the back of my 6-year-old son’s seat when my boy jumped up and told the kid to stop it now — or else.

“It was annoying,” my son said. “He just kept kicking my seat and it was making me really angry.”

The young movie theater patron was afraid of my son’s directness, and he and his family moved seats.

Studies show that the polite way to handle such a situation is to just let the kicker observe your awareness of the kicking.

“It usually doesn’t make the kicker stop,” said local professor Al Tercationfree, “but it at least let’s the kicker know that you know what’s going on.” For more about passive aggressive behavior, visit your local bookstore or Google it online.

New Year’s hopes and dreams
Hopes and dreams have reached record levels as 2009 comes to a close. According to local dream authority Rich Thinker, tough times bring out more hopes and dreams in even the most negative people.

“Unemployment rates have been hitting record levels and economic recovery seems as far into the future as hover boards,” Thinker said. “But it’s in such times that hopes and dreams are all we have to get us through.”

According to insiders, 10 percent of all dreams in this world come true. “That stated,” Thinker said, “it’s simple mathematics. When you’ve got more people dreaming and making wishes and having hope, then you’ve got more people having dreams coming true. How can you not take that action?”

My family figured our odds and placed all bets on hope. Thankfully, there won’t be some bookie named “Ice Pick Nicky” coming to collect if our dreams aren’t winners.

Michael Picarella is a Santa Clarita resident and a proud husband and father. His column reflects his own opinion and not necessarily that of The Signal.


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